Author Archives: Leo Tarvi
The Fucking Patriarchy, Part 4
“Boys don’t cry. Man up and grow some balls, you sissy, or are you just gonna cry like a girl?”
More than anything else, the fucking patriarchy hurts and oppresses women. But if we’re going to take in the scope of the thing, we have to look wider than that. Because the fucking patriarchy hurts and oppresses everyone.
Women are inferior, therefore anything a man does that is at all like a woman diminishes him, is something for him to be ashamed of. This has led to some of the most ridiculous stereotypes, since the ideal woman is clean, well-dressed, and able to do all the cooking and cleaning on top of whatever else everybody is doing, the stereotypical man is slovenly, unwashed, and lazy. I can speak to this one from personal experience, when I go out in public clean, well-groomed and stylishly dressed, it’s almost certain that someone will assume I’m gay.
Gender roles are silly things. The idea that your sex is also a job, that it comes with responsibilities specific to it, is an old one. It can be found all over the world, but no two cultures seem to agree just which duties are “manly” and which are “womanly”. There’s no practical reasons for them, we could easily just ignore these tired old social conventions and be who we like, except we still have this ghost of a dinosaur telling us to conform, conform, conform.
Conformity is a powerful force in the human psyche. When someone refuses to conform they’re ostracized, demonized, and frequently targeted for violence. The fucking patriarchy survives on conformity, and has mechanisms to defend itself from iconoclasts.
Another short post, I’m sicker today than I was yesterday. At this rate I’m going to have to stretch this out. Maybe that’s for the best, talk about something else tomorrow and get back to this subject. I’ll think about it later, for now I’m going back to bed.
The Fucking Patriarchy, Part 3
Well, I’m clearly coming down with a cold, so I’m going to try to make this quick today.
What do you call someone who isn’t interested in a long term relationship, but just wants to swing free and have casual sex? Does your answer change with the sex of the person in question? These aren’t just rhetorical questions, it’s easy to accept things like this as normal and never really think about it, never even notice the double standard.
What’s with health insurance that covers viagra but not birth control? Or vasectomies any time, but tubal ligation only if the woman has at least three children? Why is sexual autonomy simply assumed for men, but women have to fight for it?
The only answer I’ve found so far is the base assumption of the fucking patriarchy, that women are inferior. Their desires simply aren’t as important. Controlling whether you get pregnant or not isn’t as vital as getting a good hard erection. As for sterilization, well, a man knows his own mind and can make his own decisions, but women clearly can’t be trusted with important choices like this.
Back in August there was debate going on about women’s health services being covered by insurance companies. (I think the actual issue was making coverage a legal requirement, but I don’t remember and I’m sneezing too much to look it up.) The GOP was heavily opposed, especially to covering birth control. The arguments they presented were bizarre, suggesting that broad access to birth control would threaten extinction. Leaving aside the insanity of such claims, why is it even a debate whether health insurance covers women’s health? Did they have a similar argument over health services specific to men? I must have missed that one.
Starting to feel pretty miserable, so I’m off to take some cold medicine and get some tea and soup. More tomorrow.
The Fucking Patriarchy, Part 2
(While I was writing this, Mississippi’s election results came in. Prop 26, the “personhood” amendment was defeated 57/43. Scary it was that close, really, but sanity won this time.)
Hello, and welcome to Day 2 of Fucking Patriarchy Week. Today’s installment will focus on some of the various ways the fucking patriarchy disenfranchises, trivializes, isolates, manipulates, and even dehumanizes women. My standard disclaimer applies, while this is all as accurate as I could make it, you shouldn’t assume that I know what I’m talking about.
Probably the core idea on which the entire fucking patriarchy is based is that women are inferior to men. This can express itself in variety of ways: Maybe that men are stronger, smarter, and generally more capable then inferior women. Perhaps that women are as capable as men, but God placed men above women in the cosmic hierarchy. Or maybe it’s simply declared without explanation that “bitches ain’t shit”. The general idea is always the same, though: women are inferior at best. Read the rest of this entry
The Fucking Patriarchy, Part 1
Thanks to several blog posts and at least one anecdote that I’ve encountered recently I’ve decided to to dedicate a series of posts this week to the fucking patriarchy. Like all of my writing, I’ve done some basic research but one shouldn’t assume that I know what I’m talking about. I’m going to be discussing this more or less from the ground up, partly to make things clear to anyone who’s not familiar with the basics, partly to squeeze more posts for the post-a-day challenge, and partly for my own education. This is also going to be a lot more vulgar than usual, because somehow that takes the edge off a bit.
So welcome to Fucking Patriarchy Week. I’ll try to get through this with as little alcohol as possible. Read the rest of this entry
Which way are you going, Mississippi?
I often find it easier to write about topics that piss me off, though maybe harder to write coherently. The world at large really doesn’t need to treat this as an invitation.
Here’s the full text of a proposed amendment to the Mississippi state constitution that will be voted on during Tuesday’s election. (Lest you think I’m leaving something out, here‘s a link to the secretary of state’s site. Click the green checkmark for initiatives.)
Be it Enacted by the People of the State of
Mississippi:SECTION 1. Article III of the constitution of
the state of Mississippi is hereby amended BY THE
ADDITION OF A NEW SECTION TO READ:SECTION 33. Person defined. As used in this
Article III of the state constitution, “The term ‘person’
or ‘persons’ shall include every human being from
the moment of fertilization, cloning or the functional
equivalent thereof.”This initiative shall not require any additional revenue for implementation.
This is giving full civil rights status to a single cell. Not only that, but single cells which are totally dependent on a woman’s body. Like some cheesy sci-fi flick, it’s two people in one body! Read the rest of this entry
Flooded with evidence
Last night, as I wandered aimlessly through the dark alleyways of the internet, I stumbled across a comment made by a vanishing breed: A true believer in the great global flood story recorded in the Old Testament. Someone who believes the story of Noah’s Ark literally happened.
What interests me about this was an approximate date was given, circa 2400 bc. I’d seen that before, and a quick google search shows that it’s a common year given by flood believers. If there was any method used to calculate this date, it wasn’t mentioned in my brief search. Perhaps generations named in the bible, like Bishop Ussher counting begats to estimate the age of the Earth?
Anyway, the more I thought about it, the more ways I realized how small and provincial the world depicted in the story is. If the entire world had been flooded around 2400bc, killing nearly all land-based life and forcing a global re-population, it wouldn’t just be people from a few scholarly disciplines who knew about it, everyone would know it happened. Read the rest of this entry
Right, first let’s look at the Daily Post topic, then I’ll chatter aimlessly for a bit.
Topic #295:
We all have experiences where after we leave a conversation, or a date ends, we realize something clever we wish we had said.
The French call this l’esprit de l’escalier, which means, roughly, staircase wit (as in, you get the idea for something to say only when you are in the staircase, heading home).
Can you recall moments in your life, at work or at home, where you realize now there was something else you wish you had said? Or done? Make a list.
Sadly, most of the best ones have long vanished from my memory. There was one or two that I nursed for years until it finally faded just recently. But in keeping with the spirit of things I will try to recall as many as I can. I will only provide quotes, no context, even if tomorrow’s topic is to provide that context. Sorry. These are roughly in chronological order. Read the rest of this entry
“Crepuscular” is my new word for today.
From Bad Astronomy, a couple of awesome photos showing how rays of sunlight through clouds seem to fan out from the Earth’s surface, but from orbit you can see that they are practically parallel. Awesome.
Look, you got a nice long post yesterday! Just click the link to the astronomer’s site and look at the pretty pictures. I’ll have something better tomorrow.
When you gotta go…
Well, I need to get some posts written and I’ve got nothing on my mind just now. So set your wayback machine for three days ago and let’s pick up the Daily Post topic from there!
Topic #289:
How do you know when it’s time to go? Like at a party or when you meet a friend for coffee?
I find that useful signals are sounds such as approaching sirens, or activity along the lines of people lighting torches and gathering farm implements. Other subtle clues that you may have overstayed your welcome include sidelong glares, phrases such as “Oh damn he’s still here!” and defenestration.
If you’re like me, (and why wouldn’t you be?) you’ll find these tips both handy and enlightening as you improve your social life by staying only as long as people are willing to put up with your shit!
Now, having used time travel to pull topics from the past, I’m off to use it to post in the future! See you in just a minute, tomorrow!
Who are you?
A strange one from the Daily Post today.
Topic #291:
What % of who and what you are is determined by genetics vs your own choices? Is it 50/50 or more or less of one?
Or should there be three numbers: your genetics, how you were raised, and your own choices (33/33/33 or 10/40/50).
Most times when someone talks about who you are, the context makes their specific meaning very clear. This is not one of those times. Honestly I’m not even sure what the question is trying to ask, it seems to be combining at least two different meanings of “who you are”. Read the rest of this entry
Worthy of notice
Dissatisfied with recent Daily Post topics, I was cruising the web for something to write about. I read this interesting post at Blag Hag, and after a short series of adventures from there I wound up looking at Jen McCreight ‘s Wikipedia entry. If you look at that page you’ll notice the article is being considered for deletion based on the notability guidelines.
This post will not discuss whether Jen McCreight is notable enough for Wikipedia. This post is asking why Wikipedia cares about notability at all. Read the rest of this entry
Look out for the petrifying gaze
Seems like it’s been a while since I did a Daily Post topic. Let’s fix that.
Topic #289:
What makes someone beautiful?
The old adage about beholders seems to fit very well. In fact, I’d say that as I change as a person, the people around me appear to change, too. I’ve more than once met someone and thought them ugly, only for them to grow beautiful as I got to know them. The reverse has also happened.
Too much going on just now. I really need to write a big long post one of these days soon.
If only I could blog in my sleep
It often seems to me that the best times for me to write, the times when I’m most productive and have the least trouble getting stuff down, is either right after I wake up, or before I go to bed, both times when I’d rather be asleep. This seems to imply to me that the truly best time for me to write would be while I’m actually sleeping. Given the strange dream of half-buildings I had last night, I look forward to technology making this possible.
Yeah, I know. Look I agreed to write a post every day, I never made any promises about those posts being worth reading. It was either this or five pages of incoherent rant about protests and politics, and frankly I’m too tired for that tonight.
The mind is a strange thing
I got a flu shot today. While I was getting it I was thinking about how I never look at a needle when I’m giving blood or getting a shot. I don’t have any special terror of needles, I don’t have any trouble with the tiny amount of pain they inflict, but somehow I just can’t watch it. It feels like if I look I’ll chicken out.
I mean, it’s not like it feels any different whether I look or not, and it’s not like I don’t still know exactly what’s going on. I can’t fool myself into thinking that this guy isn’t jamming a needle into my bicep and injecting me with half a milligram of virus corpses just by not watching, but somehow I just have to look away.
This seems especially weird because decorative piercings, which require much larger needles that hurt a lot more, I watch intently the entire time. I don’t have many of those, so maybe it was the novelty of the thing that made the difference there, but that seems wrong too. It seems like unusual situations would make me more squeamish, not less.
In summary, the mind is weird and I don’t understand it. Tune in tomorrow for more weird stuff that I don’t understand!
The Adventures of Leo Tarvi 